Hi there guys! ‘Pino’ here, you know the cat the that the humans keep telling you about?! Anyway, they thought it would be a good idea for me to write the Blog this week!
"Should I stay or should I go?!"
I first introduced myself to the stupid people back in November, when I began my campaign to make them think that I needed help and perhaps even adopting. When I saw their motorhome and realised that they are British, I caught on that they would be very nice to me. The big male one says he is not British but Irish, but he’s equally gullible and so my plan seems to be working…
Yes, the British man likes me!
Over the past few months, I have charmed my way into their lives and I get very well fed these days. A big breakfast and a fantastic dinner every day. Plus, treats like prawn heads and other snacks most days. So, all in all they are not too bad, although a few ominous things have happened of late… Just before Christmas they trapped me in what they called a ‘cat transporter’. Then they put me in the motorhome and took me out for a drive. What the hell?!
We arrived at a very nice place that has lots of pictures of cats and dogs on the wall. I don’t like dogs much and my friends are good enough to chase them away if they come too close. This place was called a ‘Vets’ and before I knew it I was asleep. They said I’d had some injections and some other stuff all to make me healthy.
‘Just a check up!’ they said, but I am sure I am not the boy I was!
Since then I don’t quite feel that I am the boy I once was, but I do feel healthy. Just as I thought I had them under my feline control they vanished. I was suddenly all alone with no friends.
Anyway, as luck would have it, another British motorhome turned up the very next day and I was able to play them off against some Swiss people and ate quite well for the next few weeks, but I really missed those Elddis people.
I am cute, aren’t I?!
This motorhome is a cosy shelter
Then suddenly, just a few days later, they reappeared and this ‘house on wheels’ thing they call ‘Buster, the motorhome, was back in its usual spot. I was overjoyed, sprinted over, and, as I hoped, dinner was served. My family had returned! I had to keep my cool and act all cat-like, playing the Swiss lady off against the other English van, but soon the regular prawn heads from the Elddis crew won me over.
I sleep under Buster and when I get a chance (like every morning!) I jump inside and explore what might just be my home if I play my cards right. It’s not bad, you know. In fact, it’s very comfortable indeed - but I think I would want my own bed and a litter tray if I was to spend much time there.
I furtively listen in to all their conversations, whilst beguiling them with my cute cat moves. Something called Lockdown had happened. It sounds like an ominous thing, a bit like the Vets. Anyway, because of this Lockdown thing they have to stay here for the time being. I’ve formulated a cunning plan: these guys like me, and I sort of like to stay with them… and they keep feeding me!
I have watched them heading out every day for walks what they call ‘cycles’. They seem like fun, as I get prawn heads when they go cycling. The big male one keeps talking about ‘his steps’ whatever they are? 10,000 a day he says. Whatever! Just keep those prawn heads coming my way!
This is a view from one of their walks, pretty isn’t it
Yet they keep talking about bringing me back to a vet again! Why?! I have never felt quite the same since my last visit! Seemingly, I need a pet passport to go to where they live in England, which is near Brexitland, whatever that is. I also hear that it is cold there. I will need lots of tests and lots more ‘jections’. I am not too sure about this at all. I am a Spanish cat and after Brexit, I am not sure that I would fit in with the English cats.
I have checked out the accommodations for the proposed trip from top to toe. This fun-mobile has lots of places I could sleep. There is a huge soft bit they call a bed at the back that looks ideal, but the humans won’t let me try it out yet - give me a little more time and it will be mine! The humans are very clean, they don’t lick themselves like I do but they seem to manage to keep very clean. They have a toilet and shower in the motorhome as well, plus a place called a kitchen where they prepare my meals, morning and evening. They also prepare meals for themselves as well and they look tasty, but they don’t give me any as they say it is not good for me. They also go out to places called restaurants and bars sometimes for food and drink. This looks like it is good fun, they seem to enjoy it and sometimes they bring me back treats. I think all people should go to pubs and restaurants. It makes them happy!
The two humans are exceedingly kind too, they cuddle me and feed me. I like sitting on the man’s lap and licking his arm, but as soon as he thinks he has made me totally happy I will jump off. I am a cat after all!
Ahh, this is the life!
I play a lot and they have bought me toys; one looks like a mouse, sort of, and I chase it all over the place. Great fun, but he looks very tatty now. I assume they will get me a new one soon. Sometimes I get excited and scratch them with my claws, the big one is the easier one to do this to as he is slower, despite his 10,000 steps a day. But I am only playing!
I think I have killed this mouse a 1000 times! Need a new one.
So, dear readers the question is: should I trust them and go to the land of Brexit? Will I be safe? Is it too cold for a Spanish cat?
I think they would take me, but in the immortal words of my favourite band, The Clash, ‘Should I Stay or Should I Go?’
BTW, the humans seem happy this week, as the sun has come back and it is warmer during the day, so they seem to go for longer walks and cycles.
A view back to Trafalgar lighthouse from one of their walks.
The lighthouse at Sunset.
A Goats Cheese salad in the sunshine. I don’t like this stuff!
A Prawn Fritter. This is more up my street though. I like prawn heads!